guide to getting it on: a belated thank you

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i've been going through a funk of sorts.

and it's lasted entirely too long. 

getting out of bed has been hard.

today (the first day off in two weeks) was spent doing nothing but reading. in bed.  it was perfection.

but now i know it's time to move on. to get out of bed. and live like a normal person. 

and check things off my list.

so this is way overdue, but better late than never.

remember this post?

well, paul joannides made good on his promise. and i now have guide to getting it on: sixth edition.
i know you're not meant to judge a book by its cover, but i love the new cover! i can't wait to peruse the pages and see what's new. when paul offered to send me the book he also sent along a lovely email...



Life can be--uh--interesting for new grads.


Now, just wondering. What college did you graduate from, with what degree, and if you have a job, what sorts of things are you doing? Oh, and if things are different in the world of love and sex than they were when you were in college, in what ways are they different.

Sorry to be so nosey, but while I'm pretty familiar with the situation on college campuses, a lot of you more or less drop off the face of the planet the first couple of years out of college, and it's helpful for me to know the kinds of issues you are facing so I can be more sensitive to it.

I can remember how awful it was for me, but that was so far back in time we humans were still egg-layers. I would think it would be wonderful if there were some way for the transition to be fun and exciting--but I've also heard some horror stories about young guys going to work on Wall Street for next to nothing, living in a 5-story walk-up studio that's barely big enough for them and the cockroaches.

Then again, I'm sure there are other recent grads who are in a good situation, good job, and are having a blast.

So any thoughts or observations you might have for me would be wonderful, not that you aren't blogging about that.

Best,

Paul



Well, as most of you know I'm a Juilliard grad with a BFA in theatre.

 I work six days a week, earning next to nothing, and just barely cover the rent of my one bedroom apartment (I live in the living room--so my roommate and I basically don't have a common area). 

I have found the transition from college to the real world to be near impossible (of course the economy has not made it any easier). And even though I go through periods where it's hard to get out of bed, I do love my life. Thoroughly and deeply I do. The best thing about leaving school has been the realization that endless opportunities abound. I get to choose who my friends are, what I do with my day, and I am responsible for the creation of art. So life is hard. Near impossible most days. But good. And thank goodness for that. 

Now as for the romance....I've been on one blind date since I've graduated. That's it. Match. com is looking better every day. Any suggestions, Paul? Where should I go to meet men?



And as for the bloggers out there...help me give Paul some info. What was your transition like after college? And the dating scene in the years after school...what was that like for you?


#10: see the yankees play in the new stadium. check.

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i love baseball. i love the history of it. the experience of it. i love baseball uniforms and hats. i was raised on a baseball field with a mitt on my left hand. i was raised kicking the dirt with my cleats and taking practice swings in the batter's box. baseball is in me. i understand it. take me out to the ball game--oh please take me out to the ball game. i'd go any day. it's the ideal date. the ideal way to spend a sunday afternoon--any afternoon.

so when my aunt offered me her extra ticket for last thursday night i did everything in my power to finagle my way out of of work. and finagle it did--success! 

so dressed in my blue and white striped t with my yankee cap placed firmly atop my crown (i've been to many a stadium and seen many teams with many fans--but no one dresses for the occasion quite like new yorkers) i headed uptown to see the bronx bombers play in the brand spankin' new stadium.

in many ways the new stadium looks much like the old (phew, relief)--it's just newer. but the really interesting thing is that baseball fields are as influential a player of the game as anyone else involved. each field in each stadium differs: where are the holes, the gaps? how easy is it to hit a home run? well, in this stadium, it would seem that home runs are easier to come by than in others (it will be interesting to see how this comes into play in the years to come).

so on thursday night i sat in my seat way (way, way) behind home plate with its magnificent view, covered in a fleece blanket and cheered and cheered. and i dreamed of the day that husband-to-be and i will have season tickets. and then when mo (perhaps the greatest closer of all time--a closer is a pitcher who comes in to finish the game when his team is ahead) sauntered down from the back of center field we all stood and cheered as he delivered three easy outs. mariano rivera (mo) is a rockstar of baseball if ever there was one. and so with the win the voice of frank sinatra wafted through the stadium--when the yankees win they play sinatra's "new york, new york"--and we all hummed along as the thousands of new yorkers dispersed back to their own personal pockets of the city.

and i went to bed happy. in my pocket. in my bed. on the upper west side. dreaming of the fields of my youth and the games of the future.







dog-eared pages and coffee stains: a book club of sorts

in , ,








This post led to many a marvelous suggestion about books that I should read. And this list is lighting a fire under my oh-so-lovely-behind to get crackin'...a book club to form and books, books, books to read (25 before the big birthday). So... all this got me thinking. I'm adding this little collage above to my sidebar. One click on it will lead you here to this post (this ever-evolving, constantly in need of edits post). The idea is that this is a place where you (yes, you!) can leave suggestions or book reviews. It's (in a sense) a little online book club. I'll let you know what I'm reading and publish reviews as I check off those 25 books. And I'll pass on my all time favorites. So, here we go...


25 books before
25th Birthday:

1. Happens Every Day by Isabel Gillies
2. The Emporer's Children by Claire Messud
3. Dancing on Thorns by Rebecca Horsfall
4. The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger
5. The Namesake
6. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer
7. A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers







THE READERS SPEAK...THEIR SUGGESTIONS:






The Hero and the Crown
by Robin Mckinley

suggested by Sarah-Lucy




The Heartbreaking Work of a Staggering Genius
by David Eggers

suggested by Red




The Opposite of Fate: Memories of a Writing Life

suggested by Sarah-Lucy

A Tree Grows in Brooklyn
by Betty Smith

suggested by Megan




The Poison Wood Bible
by Barbara Kingslover

suggested by Katie




Suite Francaise
by Irene Nemirovsky

suggested by Katie




Water for Elephants
by Sara Gruen

suggested by Katie and by Red




The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle
by Haruki Maurakami

suggested by Katie




The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao
by Junot Diaz

suggested by Katie




The Sex Lives of Cannibals
by Maarten Troust

suggested by Christie (she said it was quite possibly the funniest book she's ever read)




The Unwanted
by Kien Nguyen

suggested by Christie




Observatory Mansions
by Edward Carey

suggested by Christie



The Shadow of the Wind
by Carlos Ruiz Zafon

suggested by Mariah




The Historian
by Elizabeth Lostova

suggested by Mariah 




The Bone Man of Benares 

by Terry Tarnoff

suggested by Tina Tarnoff









The Feast of Love
by Charles Baxter

suggested by Thao














The Time Traveler's Wife   (NOW READING)

by Audrey Niffengger

suggested by Micaela 














The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time
by Mark Haddon

suggested by Krysta











The Dud Avocado 
by Elaine Dundy

suggested by iheartkiwi














Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close
by Jonathan Safran Foer
suggested by Krysta














Animal, Vegetable, Miracle
by Barbara Kingsolver

suggested by MMW













The God of Animals
by Aryn Kyle

suggested by Lauren














The History of Love
by Nicole Krauss

suggested by JulieD










The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society
by Mary Ann Schaffer and Annie Barrows

suggested by Tina Tarnoff












On Beauty
by Zadie Smith

suggested by hay













The Blind Assassin
by Margaret Atwood

suggested by Gabby












photo credits (clockwise): 
kate spade ad, yellowbird on flickr, 
(need your help on this one), 

a saturday afternoon bit of inspiration

in


The imagination has been so debased that imagination -- being imaginative -- rather than being the linchpin of our existence now stands as a synonym for something outside oursleves like science fiction or some new use for tangerine slices on raw pork chops -- what an imaginative summer recipe  -- and Star Wars! So imaginative and Star Trek -- so imaginative! And Lord of the Rings -- all those dwarfs -- so imaginative --

The imagination has moved out of the realm of being our link, our most personal link, with our inner lives and the world outside that world -- this world we share. What is schizophrenia but a horrifying state where what's in here doesn't match up with what's out there?

Why has imagination become a synonym for style?

I believe that the imagination is the passport we create to take us into the real world.

I believe the imagination is another phrase for what is most uniquely us. 

Jung says the the greatest sin is to be unconscious. 

Our boy Holden says "what scares me most is the other guy's face -- it wouldn't be so bad if you could both be blindfolded" -- most of the time the faces we face our not the other guys' but our own faces. And it's the worst kind of yellowness to be so scared of yourself you put blindfolds on rather than deal with yourself.
To face ourselves.
That's the hard thing.
The imagination.
That's God's gift to make the act of self-examination bearable.






quote from one of my all-time-favorite's Six Degrees of Separation.
image from fffound (i'm gonna look back to find the artist's name)