thinking back. (and some much needed color on the blog).

it was a year ago now that i winged my way across the atlantic to australia. a year ago. to visit with my friend stevie before he eloped to hawaii. to fall in love with his fiancee miriam. to fall in love with lattes and mochas and infused australian light.

this morning with nothing to do i paged through my photos. allowing those year-ago feelings to wash over me.

so indulge me. here is the australia i loved. one year later.

humble offerings.

"A leaf fluttered in through the window this morning, as if supported by the rays of the sun, a bird settled on the fire escape, joy in the task of coffee, joy accompanied me as I walked."

anais nin

the air here feels--smells like october in texas. i have just a week left in utah before i head home (to where the buffalo rome) and then onward to new york. life is simultaneously crawling and hurtling. time is pliable, like taffy, stretching in all directions at once. and if find myself thankful for the little things. like cool autumn air.

i've not been a great blogger this summer. i know this. but sometimes things are hard. hard in a way that writing does not assuage or elucidate. hard in a way that privacy becomes necessary. so forgive me. please, forgive me. i'm learning, you know? and i'll get better.

image.

space. and his silence.

there have been two boys (two men, i suppose) that i have cared for. deeply.

two boys (men) who i think of.

though, not often.

not anymore at least.

but two nights ago i dreamt of one. and then today i thought i saw the other.

my mind must be sorting. figuring out where to place these two phantom figures.

and because the cup of the subconscious runneth over (so to speak), i (against my wishes) find myself thinking (consciously?) about both. with one i talk and argue and laugh and with the other we begin in silence.

and that silence is enough. always it is enough.

and so it goes. the two daydreams. the words and banter and laughter v. absolute quiet.

and the thing is, every time--every. single. time. the quiet wins. there is such peace, such love in a world where no words are needed.

image via flickr: eylul aslan

tonight's show. come rain or shine...

the show WILL go on.

two people will fall in love and attempt to run away together.

if there is no rain...we will perform outside (as scheduled in memorial park {800 east and center street} at 7 pm).

however, if the sky opens up. head to the BYU campus and find us in the HFAC. there will be signs (or people) showing you where to go. (and we'll wait for you).

if you're unsure whether we'll be at the park or on campus, check my twitter for a up-to-the minute update (of sorts).

standing in the shower. dreaming.

i took a long shower tonight. let the water rush over me.

closed my eyes and dreamt.

of the corner of 76th and columbus. and its blue storefront.

of cafe aroma's israeli lattes. foam sticking to my upper lit.

of blossom's vegan milkshakes.

of the hudson river and its flourish of green.

of boots and tights and winter hats.

of fall.

of a dingy basement bar open till four that plays nothing but marley.

of the foyer of my apartment building. the marble steps. yellowing light.

of the corner coffee shop on saturday mornings. white counter top before me. coffee and croissant.

of my towering black bookcase and the white speakers my brother got me last christmas.

of my bed. my own bed.

and the lovely family i've cobbled together in that city of millions.

soon enough. soon enough. still got some mountains to climb. figuratively and literally.