cousin.

today is my cousin kevin's birthday.

how to describe kevin?

kevin feels like my three-year-old-soul-mate.

does that make sense? not really to me either, but that's the only way i can think to describe it.

he, more than anyone else, calls me out. he reminds me to laugh, to smile, balks at my particular brand of girl-crazy and laughingly guides me back to sanity.

but more than anything else he reminds me that life is fun. it's meant to be fun. and thank god for that.

happy birthday, kevin. and thank you.

understanding.

yesterday i was having a day.

and maybe zoobie was too. because she did not want to wear her shoes. or socks.

and we were outside.

so once we collected all of the said items and finally got home and up the elevator and into the hall, i looked right at the little one.

"oh zoobie," i said.

and she looked right at me

and let out an exaggerated sigh.

she understands me so well,

this seventeen-month-old friend of mine.

zoobie and i during the great snowstorm of 2010.

(zoobie is the little girl i visit and take care of each week,

it is because of her that i get to call myself a sometimes-nanny).

sometimes life calls for a good ring-around-the-carousel.

and with it the reminder that new york city is meant to be enjoyed.

a point to the city please.

and to whitney, who reminded me.

sometimes it feels as though the whole of the universe conspires to teach me patience.

but i am not a patient person. and very resistant to new lessons.

my friend whitney came to town for the weekend. and determined to show her the best of all five boroughs i dragged her to brooklyn for grimaldi's coal-oven pizza. grimaldi's very famous coal-oven pizza. grimaldi's you-must-often-wait-in-a-line-for coal-oven pizza.

we arrived around four hoping the line would be short. it was not. we waited for an hour. in the cold. shivering and shaking.

when we finally arrived inside we watched as everyone around received their orders.

and then sat in shock as they shut down the oven. needed to be refreshed, they said.

and so we waited another hour, pizzas flanking us on either side.

and i grew grumpy.

(attractive, no?)

and our plates just sat there.

empty.

even whitney, cool-much-more-pulled-together-than-me-whitney, grew...frustrated.

and then. miracle of miracles. it came.

the relief. the sweet, sweet relief.

grimaldi's is good. really good. always good. but not necessarily worth the two hour wait.

so, go when the crowds do not.

clearly, i still have a thing or two to learn about patience.

love, love, love.

{vic and i remembering to take a picture just as we were saying goodbye. it was freezing last night, can you tell?}

i spent this weekend celebrating valentine's day in the best possible way:

with my girlfriends.

saturday night brought a wine bar followed by dinner followed by sweet treats.

we spoke of boys and success and fear and all those things so important to women in their twenties who are learning and working and figuring it all out.

and when i got home. i turned out my lights, got into bed, and thanked the universe for the love of good women--for their insight and understanding, their strength and support.

and when i talk about my girlfriends yes i mean erin and vic who shared their saturday with me and angela who i always see on sundays and so many others, but you all too--you all who read this silly thing and leave comments that continuously floor me. you all who challenge me and make me want to work harder and fight harder and love more.

so thank you.

and a very merry valentine's day to you.